Main, Meri Majboori aur WOH !

When we, me n my Dear Husband (DH), were desperately looking for a WOH having moved to a bigger 2-bedroom, this lady was referred by a wife-of-husbands-friend-becomes-your-friend with a hire-at-your-own-risk disclaimer. ‘Milne aa jao, achhe se baat karte hai’ “ Ji Bhabhi aati hu ” It’s hard to say what was scarier — interviewing a stranger to live with us or cleaning the apartment ourselves. “ Haan Bhabhi sab aata hai banana — roti b banati thi  ” … basssss .. “ab rulaegi kya pagali”!! Getting a WOH who could make desi Khaana including the hot-flat-circular-dollops-of-ghee-on-top kinda delights in pardes was overwhelming. And that was the end of discussion .. She was on-board ! “Abhi 8 baje hai Bhabhi .. 10 baje tak aa jaungi samaan leke” Its fascinating how these Burmese immigrants learn foreign languages like Hindi and Thai so quickly ! “Jaldi aana .. jaldi uthana padega na tumhe .. chai nashta aur tiffin sab banana hai “… was me securing my immediate future (read raat ki neend-S...

Before I ventured on this journey with a full time WOH .. for a brief period I would ask our apartment staff to help twice a week You know .. clean-wash-iron and stuff. Though in her 50s, she looked no more than 30. This short yet stout WOH was a perfect picture of the ‘land of smiles’. However she was different from the crowd. If you have been to Thailand, u would know what I mean by ‘Crowd’ – petite figure, colourful dresses, every strand of hair well-set and law-abiding, every inch of face a branded colour-palette and surreal eye colours, although very welcoming. Plus she was a perfectionist – Every nook and corner of our house looked like a 5-star hotel room post her cleaning session ; our clothes smelled of a new flower every time she washed them ! It was magical – from my kitchen counter to my wardrobes .. Tip-top ! One-of-a-kind OCD, every week her quest-for-best seemed amplified and so did our electricity bills. Either she had a vision issue or she wanted to clean the smallest ...

“Aise Kaun kaam karega”.. “aise baat kari hai aapne to koi kaise kaam kar sakta hai “ .. “ main nahi reh sakti Yaha” … “ Suno xxxx tumhare Alawa to koi Yaha aata jaata hai nahi .. to bhaiyya ki ring to tumhe hi pata hai kaha hai …” “ aise kaise bole ho Bhabhi … mujhe Yaha kaam nahi karna .. “ “Thik hai hum koi aur dhund lenge .. Kal Subah hisaab kar dungi .. tab chale jaana .. Abhi raat ke 12 baje hai .. hume sahi nahi lag raha Abhi jaane dena tumhe” “ nahi main Yaha 1 min b nahi ruk sakti “  and WOH left .. That was the first ever WOH I had hired on my own .. just after I moved to Bangkok post-wedding . Though I had my fair share of experiences with this species at my home and the shared-flat I lived while working in Pune but it was Either my mom or my older roomies who were at the war-front. From the last minute ‘Aaj main nahi aaungi ’ to ‘spoons-knives gayab hona’ and from ‘Wo mere nanad ki devrani ki … ki .. ki .. shant ho gayi .. to uske Kane jaana hai ‘ to weekly bai-associat...